I'm not alone in this journey. The first two days were tough and though I know I've already made more mistakes than I can count, it's reassuring to know there are so many people along side me. Thank the Lord I don't have to care for people all by myself. Nurses, attending physicians, fellow residents, medical students, even orderlies have been helpful in these first few days. I've had a three day weekend and I'm NOT READY to go back tomorrow. . . fear, not fatigue, is the culprit. I'm just so anxious but, this too shall pass.
It's such a mindset change. I was talking to my half sister tonight about the anxiety people feel when they're in a different country and they encounter culture shock. That's is exactly what this is like! There's a foreign language ("Doctor, can you sign this?"). There's a different currency (TIME, TIME, TIME). There are new sights (People turning to me to find out what I think!) There are new sounds (My heart racing as I enter an exam room). It's all so very strange. What a new world! I can only pray that I will learn to exist and flourish here!
Lord, help me to be better tomorrow, in every way. Continue to guide me and shape me into the person you have for me to be. Let me not be a burden on those around me, especially my patients and those who have to teach me. Help me to be quick to listen and fast to learn. Thank you for these first days. I offer all I have, even the not so pretty things, back to you in praise. Amen.
Praying for your journey... =)
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